Run, run, run

Using an athletics track as an analogy; the starting pistol is fired and all but one of the runners sets off to run a circuit to get to the finish line. The last guy doesn’t see the point of going all the way round so he cuts directly across the field and get to the finish line way ahead of the pack and when they do eventually get there he’s bored and will want to go and do something else. Without medication it’s very difficult to control this behaviour.

Hyperactive Children with ADHD aren’t deliberately being naughty, they’re simply bored.

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I feel like a robot

The drug I was prescribed has helped me BUT… the help is subjective. I was me all my life and then, after taking the drug, I was not-me. I like the focus it gives me but I don’t like the cost of that focus. My brain used to race ahead at a million miles an hour and process my thoughts in the blink of an eye then, when I’d found the solution to the task or problem I’d wait for everybody else to catch up.

Now my brain feels sluggish; incapable of processing more than one thought at a time.

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What’s Normal?

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, ADHD is something I was born with.

I’m reluctant to label it as an affliction because, as far as I’m concerned, it’s not; it’s just something that makes my brain function differently from what is considered to be normal.

Back then though, after hearing that conversation, I concluded my brain was broken, so I decided to seek help and find a way to repair it.

The prescribed drug made everything clear. It felt strange to have, for the first time ever, the chaotic thoughts stop bouncing, sit quietly, listen, and follow instructions.

But there were consequences…

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Whaaaaat? Really?

I turned the radio on and realised someone was talking about me. This stranger described my life in detail, sparing nothing yet, in the process, providing answers to questions I hadn’t known I was asking; being easily distracted, making careless mistakes, losing things or forgetting where I’d put them, unable to carry out instructions without losing interest, taking on new activities or tasks before completing previous chores and having difficulty organising myself. I listened, spellbound as he went on to describe my hyperactivity and impulsiveness which made it impossible for me to concentrate on tasks or act without thinking and have little sense of danger.

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